See, you are not who they see

Each and everyone of us have a purpose in this life, a “Calling”.

Our calling/our nature/our essence/who we truly are may have nothing to do with the calling of the people around us.
Specially when the people around us have no clue what so ever of what their calling is and what they are here to do in this life.

Everyone around you (friends, family, teachers, …) will spoon fed their ideas unto you, if they haven’t yet reached a certain degree of happiness, freedom and open mindness within themselves, they will constantly impose their limitations and who they believe themselves to be unto you.

Sometimes it gets “tricky”, being true to ourselves the way we know ourselves to be in an environment where no one is being even close to who they really are.

You end up picking limiting beliefs, fears, doubts, perspectives, desires, that are not yours but from a place of “love” and in order to be in the presence of those people, you choose to “make yours” so you could have some common ground to interact with each other.

Feeling exhausted, lost, confused may happen to you, not because you had really lost yourself (you can’t) but because you have “paused” your true essence and got scattered into others peoples perspectives and opinions about life.

Imagine being pure/clean, dressing fresh and beautiful white clothes and you step into a room where everyone is covered in mud, spiting mud, throwing mud at each other. In order for you to be able to be with those people you had to pick up mud too, otherwise, you would not make any sense to them, they wouldn’t even be able to perceive you.

At the end of the day, you look at yourself in the mirror and you don’t know who you are because you see someone covered in mud and you don’t recognize who she/he is.

You look at your clothes, they are so dirty and you wonder what you did wrong to have such dirty clothes ? You start to question if you are worthy of having clean and beautiful clothes again, you may even forget how clean and  fresh your clothes were to begin with.

Take a deep breath, it is not your mud. 😉

We had mud being thrown at us since the second we were born. Beginning with our family, spoon feeding to us all the rules, all the ‘shoulds’ and ‘shouldn’ts’, all the difficulties, preparing us for a scary and mean world, imposing their ways to view life and fearful perspectives unto us.

Then the mud throwing keeps going on with school, friends, jobs and society.

All of that mud will start to feel painful when you realize that your happiness comes not from the mud but from your clean clothes.

You happiness, your real happiness, comes from being aligned with who you truly are, being aligned with your calling/your purpose for this life.

Place your hand on your heart, silence your mind and feel … that’s you.

And you don’t have to agree with the life’s perspectives of anyone else around you.

You don’t have to feel like other people feel and you don’t have to feel like other people want you to feel.

You don’t have to agree and make yours other people’s rules.

You don’t need to chase other people’s goals.

You are not responsible for other people’s lives, you are not responsible for other people’s fears and you are not responsible for what other people see in you.

Understand that 99,9% of the people around you are full of sh*t. No matter how good intended they are, they know nothing of nothing about them and about you.

Understand that 99,9% of the people around you doesn’t care a slightly bit for your true happiness. They may care about the version of happiness they picture for you based on their desires, fears, doubts, lost dreams, perspectives, … Which is not the same thing.

Their fears are not your fears, their doubts are not your doubts, the challenges, hardships, heartbreaks they had are not yours and you don’t need to be prepared for them.

You are not how other people see you!

The way other people see you is 100% based on who they are, it has nothing to do you.
They see you through the definitions that they have, which none reflects who you are.
Their perspectives about you cannot limit you in any way, they literally say nothing about who you are and what is possible for you in this life.

Know this and set yourself free.

“We don’t see things as they are. We see them as we are”,
Alexandra Michelle

You don’t want to be them, you want to be You!

You don’t want their dreams, you want yours!

You want yours dreams.

You want your happiness.

You want your happy version of life.

Your happy story is unique, it has value, it is the only worth living story … your story.

This all equals to “Being yourself”, live in your calling, follow your happiness, tell the story you want to tell.

There are no rules, you have no obligation what so ever to justify what your heart desires and to make sense to other people.

Your soul purpose and your heart’s inspirations are far beyond any justification.

“The only sense it has to make, is the sense of making you happy”
Filipe Moleiro

Your heart, your happiness, your purpose, that sense of what you want, what you dream of, who you know yourself to be, is the only thing in this world that is not worth sacrificing.

“Live a life where your heart is truly in because anything else is a waste of who you are and we have a finite amount of time”
Alexandra Michelle

Take some deep breaths and remember who you are. Find places to be still, to be quiet, to be alone with yourself.

Let go of the noise in your mind.

Let go of other peoples voices in your mind.

Let go of other people …

All that you will ever want in this life is to be you.

Honestly, purely, perfectly, to be yourself.

Find your inner place where there are no limitations, where there is no world, where there is no people. Find yourself there, embrace what it inspires you to be, stay with that feeling and be in your calling.

“Sometimes you have to kill who you used to be to become who you were meant to be.”
Alexandre DeLeon

Filipe Moleiro

Contact me for coaching sessions: filipe.moleiro@hotmail.com

Whatsapp | Skype | Messenger | Twitter | Presential (depending on location)

Coaching page: https://filipemoleiro.com/coaching/

Become my Patron on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/filipemoleiro

Photo by Alexandre DeLeon – https://www.instagram.com/bohnes/

 

13 thoughts on “See, you are not who they see

  1. Great post! I just had a fall-out/fight with a “friend” who claimed I hadn’t changed at all, despite the fact I feel I have, because nothing in my surrounding had changed (housing, work, friends). She could not understand my change came from within and it was a relief to let her go. Sounds cruel, but her stating that made it clear to me we don’t share the same mud any more, to use your analogy. To be able to be yourself is enabling yourself to grow in any which way you want to.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Samantha, thank you. 🙂
      I have recently had the same issue with a long time “friend”. I can tell you that you did a great choice, because your friend did not gave the freedom to be yourself, your new self, in order for you to remain friends you would have to abandon who you are and that was never going to work.
      The friends that truly resonate with you will stay and will come.

      I felt the same relief and freedom as you did 🙂
      Doing such a “cruel” thing, being free, happy and all that “nonsense” stuff 😜

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh, I know right! She thought we had a great friendship, but for me it felt like I was a jailor, one with a ball chained to her leg trying my hardest to be the friend she expected me to be and completely losing myself in the process, leaving me exhausted. She did not get it at all, why I ended the friendship, yet I feel like I can finally take a deep, long breath. Freedom doesn’t come for free, but it’s definitely worth fighting for!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Totally relate. 🙂 Was the exact same thing for me.
        From a limited point of view they can’t understand, we got be okay with that, they don’t have to understand 🙂
        We are free to be as we want to be, so are they, if our paths do not stay together anymore there is nothing wrong with that.
        The “cruel”, “bad”, are just ego nonsense labels 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      3. True! Although I’d rather seen she’d understood my point of view. Oh well. Live and let live. On to free and better days! 😀

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi. Thank you very much 🙂 The whole purpose of it is to be inspire people and truly make a difference in their lives.
      I’m thankful for the fact that it atttacted you, thanks for the nomination you have an amazing blog yourself. 🙂

      Kisses

      Liked by 1 person

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